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Yoga in the Oval Office? Tobey Maguire, star of the pro-choice film
Cider House Rules and the Civil War Saga Ride With the Devil, has
his own house rules: Be young, be hip, and take no lip.
George: Why should we elect you?
Tobey: Why wouldn't you want a 24-year-old actor running the
country?
G: What would be your campaign slogan?
T: Vote for Tobey.
G: How would you raise money for your campaign?
T: A bake sale.
G: Which of your activities would present the greatest challenge to
your spin doctors?
T: My habit of telling the truth.
G: What activity would pose the greatest challenge to your secret
service detail?
T: Pickup basketball games.
G: How much personal information do voters have the right to know
about you?
T: None.
G: What's the biggest problem in the world? And how would you fix
it?
T: A lack of social consciousness. Better education.
G: Whom would you appoint to your cabinet?
T: Ignatius J. Reilly, from A Confederacy of Dunces ; Edmond Dantes,
from The Count of Monte Cristo ; and Santiago, from The Alchemist.
G: Who would be your spiritual advisors?
T: Bill Wilson and Austin Powers.
G: Write the forst news headline about your administration.
T: YOGA REQUIRED IN SCHOOLS.
G: What person, living or dead, would you model yourself after as
the leader of the free world?
T: Peter Finch as Howard Beale in Network.
G: What book would be required White House reading?
T: Backgammon: The Cruelest Game.
G: Whom would you pardon?
T: Pete Rose.
G: What would you legalize?
T: Assaulting abusive paparazzi.
G: What would you outlaw?
T: Cigarettes.
G: What would you veto every time it hit your desk?
T: Any budget cuts in education.
G: What three objects must you have in the Oval Office?
T: A backgammon board, a CD player, and cigars.
G: Who would get an invitation to stay in the Lincoln bedroom?
T: Michael, the chef at Picasso Cafe in New York. He could come and
cook pizzas - the best I've ever eaten.
G: Who would never get an invitation?
T: That wouldn't be very kind of me to say.
G: How would you unwind from the pressures of the job?
T: Play basketball, eat a good meal, and get a massage.
G: Name the movie based on your presidency.
T: The World According to Tobey.
© 1999 George Magazine |
